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Merv

Demand answers.

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Is there any reasonable answer why urine dehydration and optimum stool charts would be on display in a mens toilet and not the womens ?

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Are kidney disease and bowel cancer higher in men?  Probably similar as to why there are no mammogram or pap smear signs above the urinal as well..

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21 minutes ago, tortoise said:

Maybe men are less aware???

Of everything.  Always.

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It happened to be one of the girls who raised the issue.

Anyway the Bristol stool chart now shares wall space with a Ikea bar stool chart.

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2 hours ago, Merv said:

Anyway the Bristol stool chart now shares wall space with a Ikea bar stool chart.

My stools are generally a lot different after a night at the bar.

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Generally easier for blokes to observe the urinary colour in real time.

Stool charts, never seen one. Not that keen.

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The Head of marcoms sent a memo around to make us aware that 'female' member of staff was seen leaving the toilets without washing her hands :-[] He then installed laminated posters on the doors of all the female toilet cubicles, reminding us to wash our hands. He did not install the posters in the men's cubicles 😞 The Head of marcoms is gay. I suspect he is worried about contracting 'girl-germs'.

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9 hours ago, The Customer said:

The Head of marcoms sent a memo around to make us aware that 'female' member of staff was seen leaving the toilets without washing her hands :-[] He then installed laminated posters on the doors of all the female toilet cubicles, reminding us to wash our hands. He did not install the posters in the men's cubicles 😞 The Head of marcoms is gay. I suspect he is worried about contracting 'girl-germs'.

Our company used to put on Friday night drinks and finger food. I started keeping an excel spreedsheet with the names of every male employee I witnessed going to the toilet and not washing their hands. 

Apparently keeping a file titled "piss hands" on the shared drive wasn't funny. Or at least HR didn't find it funny......

 

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20 hours ago, Bored@work said:

Our company used to put on Friday night drinks and finger food. I started keeping an excel spreedsheet with the names of every male employee I witnessed going to the toilet and not washing their hands. 

Apparently keeping a file titled "piss hands" on the shared drive wasn't funny. Or at least HR didn't find it funny......

I often don't wash my hands after a pee. I know how clean I am and know where I have been. I don't know where all the others have been and what they have touched etc. Plus some toilets you don't want to touch anything........ oh.... and I time my exit so that someone comes in and I can catch the door with my foot so I don't have to touch the door handle :)

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5 minutes ago, IronmanFoz said:

I often don't wash my hands after a pee. I know how clean I am and know where I have been. I don't know where all the others have been and what they have touched etc. Plus some toilets you don't want to touch anything........ oh.... and I time my exit so that someone comes in and I can catch the door with my foot so I don't have to touch the door handle :)

You're joking.  Right? 

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My boss used to take the newspaper into the cubicle with him for his morning constitutional.  Often placing it on the floor. Then leave it on the meal room table when finished.  

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35 minutes ago, IronmanFoz said:

I often don't wash my hands after a pee. I know how clean I am and know where I have been. I don't know where all the others have been and what they have touched etc. Plus some toilets you don't want to touch anything........ oh.... and I time my exit so that someone comes in and I can catch the door with my foot so I don't have to touch the door handle :)

We have a weirdo at work like that. Apparently I'm not allowed to poke fun at him.......

 

I have spent a lot of time with HR

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We had another guy who used lick the remains of his spoon and drop it back in the cuttlery draw.  😅  I mean who else wouldn't do that ?

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Haven’t you heard the joke?

There's a Navy guy and a Marine both peeing at the same time. They both get done at the same time an as the Navy guy washes his hands the Marine is about to walk out so, the Navy guy says to him, "In the Navy they teach us to wash our hands." so the Marine says, "In the Marines they teach us not to pee on our hands."

 

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On 10/01/2019 at 1:27 PM, Merv said:

Is there any reasonable answer why urine dehydration and optimum stool charts would be on display in a mens toilet and not the womens ?

It would be a lot better to put in there what crap food does to all you fat f#cks.

FM

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On 12/01/2019 at 2:30 PM, IronmanFoz said:

I often don't wash my hands after a pee. I know how clean I am and know where I have been ... 

In this case you have just been to the toilet

In order to smell something, molecules from that 'something' have made their way to your nose.  I'm guessing a lot more molecules will have landed on your hands, than what made it up your nose.

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1 hour ago, Rob said:

In this case you have just been to the toilet

In order to smell something, molecules from that 'something' have made their way to your nose.  I'm guessing a lot more molecules will have landed on your hands, than what made it up your nose.

And then keep landing on your hands until you leave the toilet. To really be effective, the basins should be in the next room, and the door should be operated with a foot button, not by using your freshly washed hands to grab the handle that has been sitting there picking up those molecules all day.

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We suspect someone combines morning tea with their constitutional.  Smells remarkably like a sausage roll or perhaps he has bad HFLC ?

Edited by Merv

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On 12/01/2019 at 3:50 PM, Merv said:

We had another guy who used lick the remains of his spoon and drop it back in the cuttlery draw.  😅  I mean who else wouldn't do that ?

I was in Germany recently at a Christmas market. The store selling raclette ASKED you to lick your spoon and put it back in the 'used' pile. Presumably they washed them before using them again, but still... I didn't get raclette from there.

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On 12/01/2019 at 2:50 PM, Merv said:

We had another guy who used lick the remains of his spoon and drop it back in the cuttlery draw.  😅  I mean who else wouldn't do that ?

How many of you oldies sucked on a sponge in a race (and then threw it on the ground, only to be re-used and sucked on by the next guy)?

And we won't even mention the guy who wiped down his nether parts with that sponge about 10 minutes before you sucked on it. :)

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Life can be pretty gross-think about how many mouths that restaurant fork has been it, how many bums that hotel towel you are drying your face with has wiped, how many people have shagged in your hotel bed....

not to mention the ungodly cesspool of public pool water going in your mouth that was moments earlier washing around some old dirty so and so's un washed nether regions...

Enough to make you stay indoors and never leave home lol

Edited by more

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9 hours ago, Ex-Hasbeen said:

How many of you oldies sucked on a sponge in a race (and then threw it on the ground, only to be re-used and sucked on by the next guy)?

And we won't even mention the guy who wiped down his nether parts with that sponge about 10 minutes before you sucked on it. :)

Ewww, you squeeze those sponges over you. You don't suck on them!!

9 hours ago, more said:

Life can be pretty gross-think about how many mouths that restaurant fork has been it, how many bums that hotel towel you are drying your face with has wiped, how many people have shagged in your hotel bed....

not to mention the ungodly cesspool of public pool water going in your mouth that was moments earlier washing around some old dirty so and so's un washed nether regions...

Enough to make you stay indoors and never leave home lol

 The forks are washed in crazy hot water

The towels too

The sheets too

The pool water has lots of chlorine

PLEASE don't rely to this and make my become a hermit 😟

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18 minutes ago, Cranky said:

Ewww, you squeeze those sponges over you. You don't suck on them!!

 The forks are washed in crazy hot water

The towels too

The sheets too

The pool water has lots of chlorine

PLEASE don't rely to this and make my become a hermit 😟

How hot is really hot enough?

How much chlorine is really enough?

:P

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15 hours ago, Cranky said:

Ewww, you squeeze those sponges over you. You don't suck on them!!

Doesnt stop the "person"  before you from having washed "their" crotch with it. Then you squeezed it all over your head and face. Or hands etc. 🤢 

Edited by Turts
For pieman

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13 hours ago, Turts said:

Doesnt stop the guy before you from having washed his crotch with it. Then you squeezed it all over your head and face. Or hands etc. 🤢 

Why are males singled out as the only ones who'd wash their crotch?  Or are you saying females do it but their crotches are hygienic?

#equalopportunitytowashsweatycrotches

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1 hour ago, pieman said:

Why are males singled out as the only ones who'd wash their crotch?  Or are you saying females do it but their crotches are hygienic?

#equalopportunitytowashsweatycrotches

My apologies. Equal grot for all. 

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1 hour ago, pieman said:

Why are males singled out as the only ones who'd wash their crotch?  Or are you saying females do it but their crotches are hygienic?

#equalopportunitytowashsweatycrotches

Because I was the one who started the conversation about sponges, and I don't get chicked! :)

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23 hours ago, Turts said:

Doesnt stop the "person"  before you from having washed "their" crotch with it. 

Really? People do that? Why????

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