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The Mental Health thread

Mental Health  

303 members have voted

  1. 1. Do you suffer from a mental illness?

    • Yes
      97
    • No
      169
    • Maybe - yet to see a doctor about it
      39
  2. 2. Do you know someone who suffers a mental illness

    • Yes
      247
    • No
      31
    • Don't know but suspect they do
      27


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2 hours ago, AA7 said:

From your weekend FB posts from parkrun, I assume that Lily is not really into it as much as Olivia? But I think it's great that she volunteers. 

Correct, and I make sure that I make a big deal about her doing this. They don't often let kids volunteer unsupervised but she prooved herself the first time around and now they love her. She does a great job.

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32 minutes ago, Cranky said:

Correct, and I make sure that I make a big deal about her doing this. They don't often let kids volunteer unsupervised but she prooved herself the first time around and now they love her. She does a great job.

Yeh, volunteering is great thing for kids to do.

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In the pilbara in the last 4 weeks we have had 6 suicides including a 12 year old girl in port hedland last Sunday.  I just found out today that two of the men who passed away i knew personally, worked with one closely about ten years ago and then the last 3 years have been on the same site as him again albeit working for different companies, another was one of the apprentices on this site also.

I just wish they had of reached out...to anyone.

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2 hours ago, KieranR said:

In the pilbara in the last 4 weeks we have had 6 suicides including a 12 year old girl in port hedland last Sunday.  I just found out today that two of the men who passed away i knew personally, worked with one closely about ten years ago and then the last 3 years have been on the same site as him again albeit working for different companies, another was one of the apprentices on this site also.

I just wish they had of reached out...to anyone.

Wow. That's sad :(

And the 12 year old!??? My goodness :(

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11 minutes ago, Cranky said:

Wow. That's sad :(

And the 12 year old!??? My goodness :(

And also a 14 yr old girl from a remote Kimberly community last week, both young girls from aboriginal families, the news article i read on both of them has said there is a review or report being done on the effects of alcohol dysfunction in aboriginal communities, which may be a part of the reason these young kids are taking their lives, having spent a lot of time in the communities up there, alcohol misuse is high even in the communities where there are dry towns, they will head to the outskirts and sit there and drink and be violent, then come back to town.  I've seen it with my own eyes.  It's terribly sad

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On 10/01/2019 at 5:34 PM, AA7 said:

Yeh, volunteering is great thing for kids to do.

I made both my kids volunteer as part of their CV in the lead up to Year 10. Each time it was the Sydney Marathon. They were a little hesitant but I told them no butts. They like it so much after the first time, they did it again. My daughter was even showing her team supervisor what to do and how to do things properly. I just kept on working as a volunteer and having a little chuckle to myself - a 14 year old showing a Uni student the best way to do things. It built a lot of confidence and character  

FM

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Im writing here because its a safe place for me so please no judgment.  I'm struggling.  Left home last night just feeling overwhelmingly sad, not sure why, but i went for a swim and then didn't come home until close to 3 am.

I literally am just feeling sad (it's hard to explain)  - theres a bit going on in my life but nothing i feel thats driving me to this feeling etc. 

 

Soon to be redundant possibly, its a bit unknown, this contract is winding up but work have said they want to keep me, but no new offer yet, not worried about this as there a few options.  Will wait and see how it pans out

Things at home with the kids are good - I've been an improved dad recently

Things with wife are still moving forward (refer previous posts)

So im really not sure why i feel this way, when i cam home early this morning she ripped into me (understandably)  I scared her last night and she was genuinely terrified i was gone, Probably because i said dont wait up for me as i walked out the door and didn't take my phone or anything with me, i drove around for hours and climbed up our big water tank and just sat there, totally numb for hours.

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Kieran, I know myself, sometimes I just feel sad. Nothing specific, just sad. I'm not sure it's anything I need to worry about as I know I get back out of it pretty quickly. I think the key for me is not being too concerned about it and just letting it happen. 

I know at times it can be really necessary to withdraw. But scaring your SO is not ideal. Communicating how you are feeling and the need for some space is definitely a better way to handle it. Less likely to get you torn a new one too. I'm unsure if you guys are in the place you need to be for that kind of communication at this stage though.

Please talk if you need it Kieran, and if you don't, know there are many thinking of you. x

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Kieran,

100% what Katz has said and suggested.Just keep on talking to people on here and to those around you.

Edited by BigRig
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8 hours ago, KieranR said:

Im writing here because its a safe place for me so please no judgment. 

That was established as a given fifty pages ago

Vent brother, that's what the thread is for

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19 hours ago, KieranR said:

Im writing here because its a safe place for me so please no judgment.  I'm struggling.  Left home last night just feeling overwhelmingly sad, not sure why, but i went for a swim and then didn't come home until close to 3 am.

I literally am just feeling sad (it's hard to explain)  - theres a bit going on in my life but nothing i feel thats driving me to this feeling etc. 

 

Soon to be redundant possibly, its a bit unknown, this contract is winding up but work have said they want to keep me, but no new offer yet, not worried about this as there a few options.  Will wait and see how it pans out

Things at home with the kids are good - I've been an improved dad recently

Things with wife are still moving forward (refer previous posts)

So im really not sure why i feel this way, when i cam home early this morning she ripped into me (understandably)  I scared her last night and she was genuinely terrified i was gone, Probably because i said dont wait up for me as i walked out the door and didn't take my phone or anything with me, i drove around for hours and climbed up our big water tank and just sat there, totally numb for hours.

That's shit you feel like this. Sorry. It's perfectly normal to feel crap though. Agreed, you should've told your other half you needed time but you would be back, but I get why you did what you did. Sometimes all the little things just pile up. There's sometimes nothing that you FEEL is significant but lots of little bricks can make one bloody big building and maybe that's just what's going on with you. How's your sleep?

Take care and vent whenever you want to.

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Hey Kieran,

It happens. I felt miserable yesterday for no reason whatsoever. Just gloomy, couldn't be arsed with work (and we've got a lot on at the moment) etc. So I left the office and went for a walk and then a swim and felt a bit brighter but still quite sad. That's OK. Don't beat yourself up over it.

But like others have said, cutting people out is not the best course of action. It can be tough to say to somebody that you feel sad and no you don't want to talk about it just want to be on your own but yes you are coming back and you will take your phone just in case. But guess what, she loves you and knows you probably better than anybody else in the world (including yourself) and so will understand.

Stay safe and great news on the little one's diving!

 

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6 hours ago, KieranR said:

Well to put a smile on my face this arvo I decided to leave work early and go and watch my daughter do her introductory to scuba diving course, only 8 months until she can do her junior open water dive ticket.  In the meantime I’ll be taking her for shore dives up to about 8m with her breathing off my octopus (emergency reg for the uninitiated).  She nailed it in the pool today.

Yep take some time for yourself and enjoy life. 

My wife has been under a load of stress lately at work (way too much work & not enough resources available) and its affecting her mental health. She went in last week & told them she's not coping and will be taking this week off. The regional manager told her she was being silly and they needed her in the branch. 

Her response was if "I come in next week, it will be to clear out my desk & get my belongings" 

Today we are going on a bakery tour and enjoying time as a family.

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I'm just EXHAUSTED! I have a resource here who does not seem to think for himself, who does not do the job properly, and then blames everyone else when shit goes wrong. I'm exhausted just dealing with him. The other one in the team is S-L-O-W and does not document, it's shitting me.

Although bright spot is I have a guy who has just started on the 7th and is a breath of fresh air. Exact opposite, only issue was getting all his access sorted!

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8 hours ago, KieranR said:

Well to put a smile on my face this arvo I decided to leave work early and go and watch my daughter do her introductory to scuba diving course, only 8 months until she can do her junior open water dive ticket.  In the meantime I’ll be taking her for shore dives up to about 8m with her breathing off my octopus (emergency reg for the uninitiated).  She nailed it in the pool today.

Great move Kieran to do something to make yourself smile. Well done dude. 

Taking time out is ok just be sure to let your wife know 😉 

Edit to add - you dont want to be in the dog house as well 🤔

Edited by Surfer

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9 hours ago, MissJess said:

I'm just EXHAUSTED! I have a resource here who does not seem to think for himself, who does not do the job properly, and then blames everyone else when shit goes wrong. I'm exhausted just dealing with him. 

Hey Jess, not picking on you more the way “corporate” has moved in recent times, but if I was “a resource” not “a person” I wouldn’t be overly motivated either. 

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We're going through another round of redundancies, but this time my group isn't affected. There's some miserable folk in the office though.

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We had to put down a member of our family yesterday.  It's amazing how attached we can become to our four legged friends and how much it can effect you having to make the decision to end their lives.  I just hope we did make the right decision, but at least now our little girl gets to sleep in peace for eternity.  I'm at a loss right now, and am incredibly sad.

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I haven't been strong enough to support others on here lately, but my thoughts are still with you all.  Well done and thanks to all the stronger folks who provide value and keep this thread going.  Even when I don't get on Transitions much I still usually cast an eye over this thread and find comfort in the fact that there are so many good, supportive and positive people around.

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On 23/01/2019 at 8:51 PM, Ex-Hasbeen said:

We're going through another round of redundancies, but this time my group isn't affected. There's some miserable folk in the office though.

Ex, in my experience it is a tough gig..... initially. The majority I have spoken to after they have left is quite different though. They find their way and more than 50% are happy with their change. In fact, some say it is the best thing they could have done.  

Take some solace that it can turn up a great opportunity. 

As for me, I would LOVE it.

FM

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On 23/01/2019 at 12:32 AM, KieranR said:

Well to put a smile on my face this arvo I decided to leave work early and go and watch my daughter do her introductory to scuba diving course, only 8 months until she can do her junior open water dive ticket.  In the meantime I’ll be taking her for shore dives up to about 8m with her breathing off my octopus (emergency reg for the uninitiated).  She nailed it in the pool today.

It's nice that you can share something with her but as an experienced diver (over 500 hours underwater) it would be incredibly irresponsible and dangerous (not to mention likely illegal) to take her on dives using an octopus.

Don't do it - wait until she gets her ticket and do it properly. Are you really willing to risk both your lives because you're impatient? You could kill her and yourself.

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12 minutes ago, Flanman said:

As for me, I would LOVE it.

I would too, but my SO is totally against it. She likes the so called "security" my job has. I couldn't get it at the moment even if I wanted, but if I did it would be with 2 year's worth of "after tax" pay in the hand. It'd be sooooo tempting if it was offered.

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I remember when one of my mates got a big redundancy.  He didn't even start looking for a new job for over a year, and still sunk money into his house, trips etc.  Then I think his first job back was sub contracting back to those he had worked for.

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I was in a job for 22 years, the last 2 wishing and hoping for a redundancy package.  In the end, I couldn't hold out any longer and resigned to go to another job. 3 years later, I was the proud owner of 2 separate redundancies.  Unfortunately, with no real tenor in either role they were next to nothing.

Redundancies are not nice, particularly if you have been "institutionalised" and don;t know anything outside your of your current workplace, however as said previously, they can also be a good thing.  My first redundancy was a god send as I wasn't enjoying the role however I would have stuck it out due to various financial commitments. Whilst it wasn't easy to manage until I fund my next job, it worked out best as I picked up a role for significantly more cash and enjoyed it more.

Easy to say but look at them as an opportunity for something new

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1 hour ago, trinube said:

It's nice that you can share something with her but as an experienced diver (over 500 hours underwater) it would be incredibly irresponsible and dangerous (not to mention likely illegal) to take her on dives using an octopus.

Don't do it - wait until she gets her ticket and do it properly. Are you really willing to risk both your lives because you're impatient? You could kill her and yourself.

Fair call, probably just take her out and she can snorkel on top and dive down to some Bombies while I free dive and look for a feed with the spear gun.  She’s incredibly comfortable in the water and with what’s in it and is already happy sitting on the bottom holding her breath.  She has already asked to have a spear to which I said not yet.  She’s getting a snare though for those shallow water Crays up here

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On 23/01/2019 at 8:51 PM, Ex-Hasbeen said:

We're going through another round of redundancies, but this time my group isn't affected. There's some miserable folk in the office though.

Ex - pretty sure we used to work together if I am piecing things together correctly. June 20th is my code word.

I got out in November, after being directly placed into a role through the October round. My team was halved and the work remained. I went from a B1 to being paid a B1 doing the work of my grad. The mental health change (in moving out of the org) has been enormous: getting away from what was a pretty dire culture and everyone waiting for the next round: some hoping to be included (old timers) and others worried about being able to pay their mortgage.

I don't have any advice, other than, put yourself first. No one else will...

 

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On 23/01/2019 at 7:00 AM, roxii said:

Hey Jess, not picking on you more the way “corporate” has moved in recent times, but if I was “a resource” not “a person” I wouldn’t be overly motivated either. 

Was gonna say the same. The term 'resource' has become a pet peeve of mine. At my place of work, we have 20 marketing staff feeding projects to just 3 designers. During times where we simply can't keep up with demand our concerns get shrugged off as a 'resource' problem. If only we could lay off 4 of the marketing staff taking up space and replace them with a couple of solid senior design staff and the 'resource' issue would be solved.

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6 hours ago, The Customer said:

Was gonna say the same. The term 'resource' has become a pet peeve of mine. At my place of work, we have 20 marketing staff feeding projects to just 3 designers. During times where we simply can't keep up with demand our concerns get shrugged off as a 'resource' problem. If only we could lay off 4 of the marketing staff taking up space and replace them with a couple of solid senior design staff and the 'resource' issue would be solved.

We're referred to as "assets" 

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4 hours ago, Bored@work said:

We're referred to as "assets" 

Crikey. My people are people!

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2 minutes ago, monkie said:

Crikey. My people are people!

Theyre lucky, we're referred to as FTE & always an accronym, never in full

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48 minutes ago, Surfer said:

Theyre lucky, we're referred to as FTE & always an accronym, never in full

To HR & anybody at Director level, they are FTE, but I have people in my team, and always refer to them collectively as Team. I think that's what we are, so it makes sense to use the term.

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Talent is used around our workplace a bit ie 'we've got some new talent coming onboard'. Ugh.

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15 hours ago, Bored@work said:

We're referred to as "assets" 

At my work, this is how we refer to them, but we omit the "t".....

 

Note: I work alone!

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Found out yesterday that my friend who spent Christmas in a secure psych ward now has liver cancer. FFS. It doesn't just rain. It pours.

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4 minutes ago, monkie said:

Found out yesterday that my friend who spent Christmas in a secure psych ward now has liver cancer. FFS. It doesn't just rain. It pours.

That's awful Monkie. I'm really sorry to hear it.

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3 hours ago, Katz said:

That's awful Monkie. I'm really sorry to hear it.

Thanks Katz. I feel a bit less useless this time round because Mrs Monkie is in the UK at the moment and so is proxying me as a friend!

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1 hour ago, monkie said:

Thanks Katz. I feel a bit less useless this time round because Mrs Monkie is in the UK at the moment and so is proxying me as a friend!

I can't even imagine Monkie. Be kind to yourself. 

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My work colleague and mate has just been charged with possibly one of Australia's worst sex crimes. Feel pretty sick about it. Although you could argue innocent before proven guilty, but doubt they'd charge him and release his name without sufficient evidence. 

https://www.perthnow.com.au/news/court-justice/paedophile-probe-evil-8-investigators-charge-ninth-man-ng-b881099981z

 

Edited by zed

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15 minutes ago, Katz said:

Jesus.

Yup. I chatted to him on the Thursday and he was in court on the Friday. Then we found out on the Saturday. He's been told not to turn up to work, but he hasn't been fired and is still being paid. 

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I remember this case and its absolutely horrifying what happened to that young girl at the hands of these monsters.

I would presume he wont be your mate any longer

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Jeeze zed.  I can't imagine how you must be feeling and what must be going through your head.  Do you work at a place that would have people for you and other colleagues to talk to?

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39 minutes ago, KieranR said:

I remember this case and its absolutely horrifying what happened to that young girl at the hands of these monsters.

I would presume he wont be your mate any longer

No. 

What I'm struggling with is not despising him, not feeling as angry as I think I should.. Which is making me feel guilty. I spoke to a colleague who feels similarly. I'm disgusted and won't ever talk to him again, but if you gave me a gun I couldn't pull the trigger, whereas any of the others in that group I wouldn't hesitate. maybe I'm still in shock. I'm struggling to associate him with the crime. I don't know if that makes sense.

Edited by zed

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Just now, goughy said:

Jeeze zed.  I can't imagine how you must be feeling and what must be going through your head.  Do you work at a place that would have people for you and other colleagues to talk to?

We've been offered counselling. Not sure what I'd say. I'm still processing it. I guess I want to wait till he goes to court in March. 

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18 minutes ago, zed said:

No. 

What I'm struggling with is not despising him, not feeling as angry as I think I should.. Which is making me feel guilty. I spoke to a colleague who feels similarly. I'm disgusted and won't ever talk to him again, but if you gave me a gun I couldn't pull the trigger, whereas any of the others in that group I wouldn't hesitate. maybe I'm still in shock. I'm struggling to associate him with the crime. I don't know if that makes sense.

I don't think you should look too deeply at your own reaction/thoughts to this yet Zed. It will take quite some processing internally, so don't beat yourself up.

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Waking up and finding that Luke Perry has succumbed to his stroke, and another musician has passed, Keith Flint from the Prodigy (just been in Australia) is kinda sobering.  Perry's has had me feeling very mortal of late.  Just a funny feeling.

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I think it's probably timely, not just due to the high profile suicide, but also due to a couple of others I've heard of recently, to remind everyone this thread is here.

No matter what the issue, big or small, talk. Please talk. 

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On 05/05/2011 at 7:22 PM, nealo said:

O.K after starting this thread 2 years ago, I feel it's time.

A small update seeing as though the thread is coming up to 10 years since the first post!

To people suffering, it can and will get better. Thankfully in our Family's case the last 5 years or so have been great, very smooth in terms of mental health.

Unfortunately a close school friend of my Wife's took his life yesterday. She is feeling guilty, their lives took different paths but she knew he suffered from depression and feels bad for not checking on him. Sadly people come in and out of our life, we can't always be there for everyone we've ever had interactions with no matter how long or short it may have been. 

In saying that if there is anyone on your mind that you worry about or think about, send them a message or make a call, it may be all they need.

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