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The Mental Health thread

Mental Health  

303 members have voted

  1. 1. Do you suffer from a mental illness?

    • Yes
      97
    • No
      169
    • Maybe - yet to see a doctor about it
      39
  2. 2. Do you know someone who suffers a mental illness

    • Yes
      247
    • No
      31
    • Don't know but suspect they do
      27


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Ex, 

That's heavy news for me to read. Mainly because about 8yrs ago I was a poofteenth away from a massive gumtree but I swerved away and I just clipped the back of the tray of my Ute. I know what you mean. I have been there and I've come through it. If you can, with professional help or someone you trust, stare at what takes you to that headspace and pull it apart. Once it's looked into its often not as overwhelming. ✌️

 

The only difference is that I have no sporting history to lose. I have read a book by Scott Tinley called Racing the Sunset(pretty sure that was the title) about athletes after their careers. It was a good book. It would be extremely tough to not be able to get around like you could. 

 

Through counselling with a quality person(hard to find) you could learn to shift your focus from "I can't anymore" to "I can still do". You have children as far as I know, and one thing that I try to do is to be world class at parenting. Not helicopter parenting, just put that work ethic and focus on excellence into being a Dad. I learnt that from Gordo Byrne and his WordPress based blog. Best writer that I've ever read. Period. Plus he can identify with being a high class athlete and the transition to the rest of his life. 

 

The thing that I have learnt is that it's pretty awesome, just being alive. Just seeing the next day. Just drinking my morning coffee which is instant and bitter and noticing that it's unique. And often we value things because they are unique. But we fail to realise that every day is unique, every moment is a little different. How special is that...? ✌️It's ****ing cool I reckon. That's why I stare at clouds so much. They're all unique and different and I am honestly amazed at how cool that is. How special. It fills me with a sense of calm. 

 

Please take care of yourself mate. You are the reason why I dig deep in the pool. You're ****ing awesome. I need you around. We need you around. We care and we will listen. 

 

Cheers mate. Keep talking. 

 

Sam 

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3 hours ago, ComfortablyNumb said:

Ex, FP, Kieran, I hear you.  Saw a clinical psychologist briefly a few years ago who I found to be fairly useless, told me something like suicide was "a cowardly way out because of what it did to the people left behind", made me think "mate, I don't think you really understand how shit people can feel, how totally pointless everything can seem". So I just went to bed a lot of nights hoping not to wake up.  He also told me to forget triathlon, you can't fight nature (regarding my knees), take up drawing (which he gleaned was something I'd enjoyed in my childhood - but I already had creative hobbies - fly-tying & model building, so it made no sense to me).  I just stopped seeing him after 4-5 visits.

CN, that dude needs to lose their job!  That is maybe the worst single bit of advice that anyone, let alone a health care professional, can give, and is more likely to prompt an action out of someone than prevent it!  You can tell it's the wrong thing cause it's what I often say to myself, even though I know it's wrong!!

I'll try and put this into a triathlon perspective for us all.  How many on here have sought out a coach to try and reach the next level of performance?  How many here have had more than one coach, or tried a few out until they found the "partnership" that was right for them?  It is no different when looking for a mental health professional to help you out!  The first one may not be the right fit.  The second one even.  It is crucial to find the person to help you out!  It's taken me 30 years to see someone I pretty much don't hold things back with..... and that's 30 years ongoing that has been wasted!  But for most of us, when the first fit isn't right we will give up!!  DO NOT GIVE UP.  If you think you need some help, I'll guarantee you that you do!  Even hugely successful people who have everything going for themselves, and no mental health issues as such, will go seek someone out just to have a bit of a head clean.  It's one of the reasons they're so successful!!  What is the bigger issue is that it can be so difficult to get appointments, and if one doesn't work for you it can be months to get in to see another.  So we give up.  It can be a long stretch and you have to be prepared to put in the long haul, but the end result can be so much worth it.  I've been trying to get into a psychiatrist now for nearly most of this year, with appointments falling through and delays etc etc.  And I've been waiting nearly 4 months to get into this latest one.  But he's been highly recommended so I stick it out.  I wouldn't have in the past.

Ex - I didn't realise you have a brother here so I understand how that can be more confronting for you.  I'll have to bring my mate down (when his wife is feeling better) and you can take us for a swim in that pond of yours!   

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35 minutes ago, goughy said:

CN, that dude needs to lose their job!  That is maybe the worst single bit of advice that anyone, let alone a health care professional, can give, and is more likely to prompt an action out of someone than prevent it!  You can tell it's the wrong thing cause it's what I often say to myself, even though I know it's wrong!!

I'll try and put this into a triathlon perspective for us all.  How many on here have sought out a coach to try and reach the next level of performance?  How many here have had more than one coach, or tried a few out until they found the "partnership" that was right for them?  It is no different when looking for a mental health professional to help you out!  The first one may not be the right fit.  The second one even.  It is crucial to find the person to help you out!  It's taken me 30 years to see someone I pretty much don't hold things back with..... and that's 30 years ongoing that has been wasted!  But for most of us, when the first fit isn't right we will give up!!  DO NOT GIVE UP.  If you think you need some help, I'll guarantee you that you do!  Even hugely successful people who have everything going for themselves, and no mental health issues as such, will go seek someone out just to have a bit of a head clean.  It's one of the reasons they're so successful!!  What is the bigger issue is that it can be so difficult to get appointments, and if one doesn't work for you it can be months to get in to see another.  So we give up.  It can be a long stretch and you have to be prepared to put in the long haul, but the end result can be so much worth it.  I've been trying to get into a psychiatrist now for nearly most of this year, with appointments falling through and delays etc etc.  And I've been waiting nearly 4 months to get into this latest one.  But he's been highly recommended so I stick it out.  I wouldn't have in the past.

Ex - I didn't realise you have a brother here so I understand how that can be more confronting for you.  I'll have to bring my mate down (when his wife is feeling better) and you can take us for a swim in that pond of yours!   

He was German mate.  What more can I say :lol:

I also just remembered, he suggested my wife would think less of me as a man because I was appearing weak.

Rolled gold genius this bloke was!  Maybe he was in fact a serial killer with a very clever modus operandi?

Edited by ComfortablyNumb
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All I can say, CN, is **** me!

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Take care ExH. 

Our physical health & mental health are ying/yang to our complete wellbeing. Its crap when one is off kilter because of the impact on the other.

I can only echo what Goughy said - bloody hard to find somone you connect with but dont give up looking. Youre here for us as we are for you. Hugs x

Edited by Surfer
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Sorry to hear you are struggling Ex. But very glad you've made the decision to speak up. This stuff loses some of its power once it is verbalised. 

Sadly, I too know the feeling of "what if I just.....?" I used to ride a Vespa to and from work. Often while riding on the freeway I would consider just drifting off into a guardrail. 

Today, I too am struggling. The day before yesterday there was an issue at work which has left me feeling really low. I left work early that day and then didn't go to work yesterday. I have to work today and the thought of going there is filling me with anxiety. Unfortunately when anxious, I lack tolerance and am incredibly irritable. Not a good combination when you're dealing with people all day. 

Keep talking Ex. 

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13 hours ago, Ex-Hasbeen said:

I'm really not in a good place at the moment. My job is safe (so far), but I've had to tell a lot of people recently that they didn't have a job any more. That hurt bad. A lot of people don't realise that, and I don't feel I got the support I needed at the time. There's also a lot of other issues happening at the moment too.

Mate, it sucks having to do this job.  The good news is that you still feel this, seen too many people that can do this without emotion and even 1 or 2 that seemed to get some weird sort of pleasure out of it.  Take some solace that you feel bad about this - it shows you are human, and still a pretty decent one at that.  There is no rule that says you can't show that you don't like doing it, it actually makes it worse for everyone if you try too hard to hide it.

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3 hours ago, Katz said:

Sorry to hear you are struggling Ex. But very glad you've made the decision to speak up. This stuff loses some of its power once it is verbalised. 

Sadly, I too know the feeling of "what if I just.....?" I used to ride a Vespa to and from work. Often while riding on the freeway I would consider just drifting off into a guardrail. 

Today, I too am struggling. The day before yesterday there was an issue at work which has left me feeling really low. I left work early that day and then didn't go to work yesterday. I have to work today and the thought of going there is filling me with anxiety. Unfortunately when anxious, I lack tolerance and am incredibly irritable. Not a good combination when you're dealing with people all day. 

Keep talking Ex. 

Take care muscles. 

That training load will effect your headspace too. 

 

Be kind to yourself ✌️

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@Ex-Hasbeen

Being "the boss" and having to tell people they don't have a job anymore is tough. Really tough. Breaking bad news hurts. When my best mate died it fell to me to tell everybody... I did it, I got through it but I didn't deal with it and it spanked me up the backside 12 months later. You can only be strong for so long and then the persona you have been playing breaks.

Being sad is human. It's the right thing to be. If you were not sad then you would be a psychopath. 

But there's a difference between being sad and what you describe. Sometimes it takes a while to realise there's an issue but I think you identified one so please do something about it, if you have 15 minutes then give these guys a call https://thesamaritans.org.au/ I haven't used them but I used a similar support service through St John in the UK and they were great. Failing that, go see your doctor. It might not be meds, it might not be anything other than somebody listening to you for a bit. And of course, come here to vent, writing it down makes it a lot better.

I wish I could help more buddy but thinking of you. 

 

@Katz: Have a rest day. As Sam says your training will have knackered you so you ain't thinking from a place of strength. Remember, this is a hobby.

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Confronting day for me yesterday, and felt pretty raked last night, after finally getting to a psychiatrist yesterday.  He wanted to go through the whole diagnosis, and mentioned once or twice that anxiety and ADHD can get a bit mixed up, and I was pretty worried that I want gonna get the treatment regime I was hoping for.  But in the end he diagnosed add (yeah I be that), depression (yeah, I knew that) and anxiety!!! (that sorted me, but made sense).  Got meds for the add and anxiety.

But am frustrated that because my first add diagnosis wasn't prior to age 18 (was 35)  my meds can't be covered under the PBS.  So it's about $85 a month.  Annoying when my wife has a disabled pension card and we past the safety net in July so PBS meds are free now.  Arrrgggghhhhh.

The stuff had me feeling a little bit light headed this morning, like the way I feel after one beer.  So that was kinda nice.  The anxiety stuff I take tonight is suppose to be even worse, hence I have to take it right before bed.

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1 hour ago, goughy said:

 

But am frustrated that because my first add diagnosis wasn't prior to age 18 (was 35)  my meds can't be covered under the PBS.  So it's about $85 a month.  Annoying when my wife has a disabled pension card and we past the safety net in July so PBS meds are free now.  Arrrgggghhhhh.

 

Are you sure? Keep digging. When my son was diagnosed with ADHD they told me to get tested as well and sure enough...

anyway I tried meds for a while and it was covered on PBS. 

My sons anxiety is worse than his adhd but together they are a bitch. Finding it hard though to find a psych that he can talk to (part of the anxiety) so getting a useful plan moving forward is bloody hard. 

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1 hour ago, goughy said:

Confronting day for me yesterday, and felt pretty raked last night, after finally getting to a psychiatrist yesterday.  He wanted to go through the whole diagnosis, and mentioned once or twice that anxiety and ADHD can get a bit mixed up, and I was pretty worried that I want gonna get the treatment regime I was hoping for.  But in the end he diagnosed add (yeah I be that), depression (yeah, I knew that) and anxiety!!! (that sorted me, but made sense).  Got meds for the add and anxiety.

But am frustrated that because my first add diagnosis wasn't prior to age 18 (was 35)  my meds can't be covered under the PBS.  So it's about $85 a month.  Annoying when my wife has a disabled pension card and we past the safety net in July so PBS meds are free now.  Arrrgggghhhhh.

The stuff had me feeling a little bit light headed this morning, like the way I feel after one beer.  So that was kinda nice.  The anxiety stuff I take tonight is suppose to be even worse, hence I have to take it right before bed.

Good luck with it all Goughy.

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12 minutes ago, Katz said:

Good luck with it all Goughy.

Absolutely and to you Roxii.

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3 hours ago, goughy said:

The anxiety stuff I take tonight is suppose to be even worse, hence I have to take it right before bed.

Will have to see if we can spot the posts you make after you take this one :)

Or is Mrs Goughy gunna confiscate your devices?

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If she was ever going to, it would have been before now!!!

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2 hours ago, roxii said:

Are you sure? Keep digging. When my son was diagnosed with ADHD they told me to get tested as well and sure enough...

anyway I tried meds for a while and it was covered on PBS. 

My sons anxiety is worse than his adhd but together they are a bitch. Finding it hard though to find a psych that he can talk to (part of the anxiety) so getting a useful plan moving forward is bloody hard. 

I actually sat with our pharmacist yesterday (they know me well, I'm getting my wife's meds twice a week), and she looked through a number of the ADHD meds and they were all listed as "must have been diagnosed between age 6 and 18).  That doesn't mean you have to have been on medication, just the diagnosis by paediatrician, psychologist or psychiatrist.  I'm sure last time I was also getting Ritalin under the PBS as I swear I was only paying about $6 a box.  But maybe the psychiatrist I was seeing then "fudged" it a bit.  This one didn't.

Yeah, it's pretty hard watching your kids struggle!  My boy will be going back to see his counselor, but this time I don't want my wife in there as well.  I don't think he opened up enough.

But I truly believe that it has to be a partnership between a therapist and patient, and you have to find the right fit!  And that can take some time!

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Good work getting it checked out and finally some Meds to HELP you cope. 

Mental health drugs can be expensive. Geez, we(my ex and I) used to blow ridiculous amounts of money on them when I was taking them. Even with the gov help etc. But I was on a crazy cocktail. 

 

Yes they can effect your state quite a bit. Some a lot. Be honest with your doctor and keep discussing the sensations etc. Then they can change things if required. 

 

Take care mate. 

😎✌️

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8 minutes ago, FFF1077 said:

Yes they can effect your state quite a bit. Some a lot. Be honest with your doctor and keep discussing the sensations etc. Then they can change things if required. 

I have a family member on a number of mental health drugs and a number of other things.

It can be a process to get the mixes right, so do what FFF says.

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My grandad recently moved into aged care, around two months ago. We did a dash to Melb to see him at the time when he just moved in. He slowly started eating, socialising etc.  Over the past few weeks he has been experiencing increasing periods of paranoia.  Baracading his room, yelling at staff, lying on the floor hiding. This week, he was saying people were tying to poison him with acid and the government was out to get him.  Ringing everyone mltiple times and at all hours. 

Today, my mum rings, he was escorted by police to hospital after assaulting two staff.  He had a small growth in his brain, MRI about four months ago.  But this was told nothing to worry about.  Now we are all wondering.  No one seems to share information. 

He is currently at the ED and has been sedated.  Had an initial reaction of  severely decreasing HR, BP.  Everyone is exhausted. A DNR has been agreed on.

A 91 year old should not be waiting for a bed in a psych ward....or whether the first bed is.

My mum is a few hours away from my grandad.  One brother and sister and within 20 min. My mum had shoulder surgery a few years ago and found out yesterday afternoon that has another full tear in the same shoulder.  Surgery is recommended....which she is dead against. After she got home, she had a fall off the step. She lives alone.

I then rang my dad. He tells me that my sister rang him (which she very seldom does, and only when she wants something).  She wanted him to travel to Melb, from BNE to talk to my niece as she is now seeing ghost and my sisters dead house.  My dad is quite incapacitated, but my sister couldn’t care less. My niece had one round of in ward psych treatment last year, ice related and apparently a one off. My sister / niece don’t even know about my grandad....they both live within one hour away and hasn’t visited. 

Just another day....

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Must be frustrating for you to be so far away.  Sorry to hear Skel.

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Oh Skel, I am so sorry to hear what you are going through. I am grateful I am yet to experience it personally, but I see it at least once a week at work (I work in an ED so see both the oldies and the meth users). It is a really tough time for the family especially. I hope you get answers and a plan for him soon. xx

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"The Ironman is like life......sometimes you feel you are flying.....and other times you feel you must stop"

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No change.  Grandad still in hospital.  Tonight, he kept the knife from his dinner and threatened a staff member..... 😢  Trying to get the power of attorney’s (my uncle and Aunty) to give consent to the hospital so I can contact, access info and talk with social work. 

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I've been debating posting on here. My state has taken a turn for the worse. Mostly worrying about shit that is unlikely to happen, fixating on body niggles and turning them into much more than they should be and probably are. 

Does not help that I had a viral infection from last Thursday and it finally went away on Sunday afternoon. I've not trained since last Tuesday and the Osteo has told me no running for the moment. I managed to twist my back which left me with a sore butt cheek and warm feelings on my calf. Doctor was not concerned, which I worry about. 

Saw the Osteo last night, my body felt like a sore tingly mess and then I realised I might have not been absorbing my meds properly :(

Uggghhhh

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MJ, this is a safe place to vocalise, or scream if need be, no stigma included.  Sometimes a good scream does a wealth of good.

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I have a mate from work who has been off for the past three weeks - the dreaded Black Dog.

I have got him and two others with me on a course tomorrow. It should be good - it's called Ryde/Parramatta Golf Course. The ears from the three of us are open - we are just going to be there.

FM

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Like Goughy said there's absolutely no judgement here. None. 

Talk, cry, yell. 

We'll listen. 

 

Take care MJ 

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Advice wanted please;

How would you suggest to a loved one that you think they should go see a doctor about discussing bi-polar.  My wife displays several symptoms of it from what I have researched.

My problem would be trying to suggest to her that maybe she should discuss with the doctor, she will erupt and accuse me of being a prick, and then think that im trying to pick faults with her etc....which i am not, i just genuinely think she displays very similiar behaviors to what ive researched.

 

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1 minute ago, KieranR said:

Advice wanted please;

How would you suggest to a loved one that you think they should go see a doctor about discussing bi-polar.  My wife displays several symptoms of it from what I have researched.

My problem would be trying to suggest to her that maybe she should discuss with the doctor, she will erupt and accuse me of being a prick, and then think that im trying to pick faults with her etc....which i am not, i just genuinely think she displays very similiar behaviors to what ive researched.

 

Following

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arrange both of you to have yearly checkup (bloods etc) but give a heads up to the Dr beforehand. 

FM

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5 hours ago, KieranR said:

Advice wanted please;

How would you suggest to a loved one that you think they should go see a doctor about discussing bi-polar.  My wife displays several symptoms of it from what I have researched.

My problem would be trying to suggest to her that maybe she should discuss with the doctor, she will erupt and accuse me of being a prick, and then think that im trying to pick faults with her etc....which i am not, i just genuinely think she displays very similiar behaviors to what ive researched.

 

Good luck. 

You have to be a bit upfront about it. But FM idea sounds OK. 

 

FWIW - I would not like to be tricked into such a discussion. I'd shut down. 

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It can take time for someone to admit they have an issue. 

I went to the doctor yesterday, increase of meds (as I was on a very minimal dose) and looking at getting into a psych, but that is not easy, most of them have waiting lists of a few months or more, or are not taking new patients (last psych was in Melbourne).

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3 minutes ago, MissJess said:

It can take time for someone to admit they have an issue. 

I went to the doctor yesterday, increase of meds (as I was on a very minimal dose) and looking at getting into a psych, but that is not easy, most of them have waiting lists of a few months or more, or are not taking new patients (last psych was in Melbourne).

Good work getting help 👍👍👍👍

 

It can be a frustrating wait. 

Do all the right things and be kind to yourself in the meantime. 

 

So, light exercise(not "training"), minimal or no alcohol, lots of sleep, lots of fresh air and sunshine in nature, good food. 

 

It'll be worth the wait MJ

Take care 😊✌️😎💪

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The wait is really really tough!  Took me months to get into my psychologist, and was more than 4 months to get in a psychiatrist to talk new med regime, and in that time I was forced (due to a shortage) off of my then current meds.......  The wait kills, and it can be easy to talk yourself out of going.

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51 minutes ago, goughy said:

The wait is really really tough!  Took me months to get into my psychologist, and was more than 4 months to get in a psychiatrist to talk new med regime, and in that time I was forced (due to a shortage) off of my then current meds.......  The wait kills, and it can be easy to talk yourself out of going.

Yes. 

The wait can actually kill. 

At my darkest about 10 years ago I made an attempt on my own life while waiting to see doctors. It was a horrible existence. But I was an extreme case at the time. 

 

Keep talking here MJ if you want to or need to ✌️

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Much better today. I think the increase in dosage has helped. We tried everything over the last day or two to reduce or eliminate the anxiety attacks (all the standard mind stuff) but it just was not working.

Still sore though, appears I might have a mild case of carpal tunnel. :( I wished I had taken the tri bike out the other night, weight on the wrists is sometimes agony. Getting my bloods taken tomorrow as a precaution as I had a fever and tiredness most of last weekend. Just coming out of that now, woke refreshed this morning.

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Keeep talking sharing venting here MissJ,   be kind to yourself & take care x

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Take care everyone.

Its great that this place is so understanding. Keep up the good work Trannies. 🌤

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Anxiety is such a weird one... I've been fine for ages then on Monday I was in Melbourne and couldn't bring myself to walk into a coffee shop... None of them. Ended up walking around for an hour instead killing time thinking what a prat I was. Two hours later I walked into an intense pitch to three senior leaders at Wesfarmers without a single flutter of nerves.

Bloody brain.

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monkie, I've been so good for so long (7 years) not had a major issue. Then I lost it in the last week. No reason to, I have the the perfect partner who has been nothing but good to me, but one niggle in my leg after racing and then over training and that was enough to set me off.

I'm wondering if I am subconciously pressuring myself about qualifying and racing at Lausanne? No idea.

I say major issue as I always get anxiety at work when it comes to my performance and keeping my job. Which I should not be ancious about.

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Feeling ok thanks mate.  Not up, not down.  Side effects I think are starting to ease, particularly the morning tiredness.  I think I'm gonna have to enter a race though to inspire me to actually get out properly though. I have some white sections starting to show on my finger nails, and I can't remember when that last was, but would have been pre-teen at least.  Not even trying, just don't happen to be biting or picking at them.  My wife hasn't had to yell at me for a week now.  Seems weird.  The vacuum issue, stupid as it is, has been a bit stressful.

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5 hours ago, goughy said:

Feeling ok thanks mate.  Not up, not down.  Side effects I think are starting to ease, particularly the morning tiredness.  I think I'm gonna have to enter a race though to inspire me to actually get out properly though. I have some white sections starting to show on my finger nails, and I can't remember when that last was, but would have been pre-teen at least.  Not even trying, just don't happen to be biting or picking at them.  My wife hasn't had to yell at me for a week now.  Seems weird.  The vacuum issue, stupid as it is, has been a bit stressful.

Probably goes without saying, but do whatever you can to be kind to yourself while you adjust  Plenty of rest, plenty of water, etc

And speak up ;)

 

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I'm struggling today. 5 years ago I got woken up by my dad telling me that my best mate was dead. He died falling asleep at the wheel on his way back from volunteering with St John. Last year I was fine but this year it has hit me hard. I'm not sure why. Maybe 5 years is some kind of marker or maybe because I'm now so far away from everybody, I'm in HK with work and my colleagues have been great but I really should be at home with the wife. Currently sitting in a hotel room crying and working out how I can stop my bawling face being too obvious for the video conference I have in an hour. I also haven't run for two days and I'm sure that isn't helping.

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16 minutes ago, monkie said:

I'm struggling today. 5 years ago I got woken up by my dad telling me that my best mate was dead. He died falling asleep at the wheel on his way back from volunteering with St John. Last year I was fine but this year it has hit me hard. I'm not sure why. Maybe 5 years is some kind of marker or maybe because I'm now so far away from everybody, I'm in HK with work and my colleagues have been great but I really should be at home with the wife. Currently sitting in a hotel room crying and working out how I can stop my bawling face being too obvious for the video conference I have in an hour. I also haven't run for two days and I'm sure that isn't helping.

Can you call in sick? 

I have no idea how those sorts of things work?? Sorry. 

 

Deep breath. Water on the face. Do the call. 

 

Then let it ALL out before you swallow it. 

Don't drink grog. Get your running gear on and go for a easy Jog. 

 

Do things that you know WILL make you feel better ✌️

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5 minutes ago, FFF1077 said:

Don't drink grog. Get your running gear on and go for a easy Jog. 

This is, of course, what I should have done. I have not done this. I will pay for it in the morning.

E2A: But I did just speak to Mrs Monkie and remembered why I married her!

Edited by monkie
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