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The Mental Health thread

Mental Health  

303 members have voted

  1. 1. Do you suffer from a mental illness?

    • Yes
      97
    • No
      169
    • Maybe - yet to see a doctor about it
      39
  2. 2. Do you know someone who suffers a mental illness

    • Yes
      247
    • No
      31
    • Don't know but suspect they do
      27


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2 hours ago, KieranR said:

A little bit of progress with my wife last night.  I had my doctors appointment and we did up the care plan, I had to do a test on her computer first and came back with a score of 34/50 which calculates to depression.

When i got home i let my wife know what I'm doing and outlined what i had been talking to the doctor about, it was pretty raw, i was emotionless but she was balling.  afterwards she opened up on her sessions and how the psych wants to send her to Perth to see someone who specializes in childhood trauma, she is scarred and has a lot of baggage from seeing her father violently abuse her mother.  

She has never opened up to me about the level of abuse she witnessed, from what she said last night to me, it was horrendous.  I didn't ask any questions, she needs to work through it with her doctors because it is affecting her clearly, but also our relationship and the way she parents our kids

Anyway we are working in the right direction,  A lot of work to do but its a start

That sounds like great progress.

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Well that was an interesting afternoon. 

A break in the weather so took my son (11) out for a quick ride to the whale watching spot at Kurnell. 

just about  to leave when my son hears s yell and points towards the rocks. A man has fallen off and his friend is panicking.

poor guy fell about 10 m into shallow water and never moved again. We were first on scene and I ended up taking over the 000 call from the victims friend as he was too panick stricken. 

We then spent the next 20 mins watching the body get washed around on the rocks so we could guide the “rescuers” in when the chopper finally arrived. 

My son was up on the road directing police and ambos down to where we were.

my son suffers from severe anxiety, at the moment it’s all still a bit of “excitement” but not sure how it will pan out when things calm down.

anyway just another reminder that life is precious, be careful out there. 

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1 hour ago, roxii said:

Well that was an interesting afternoon. 

A break in the weather so took my son (11) out for a quick ride to the whale watching spot at Kurnell. 

just about  to leave when my son hears s yell and points towards the rocks. A man has fallen off and his friend is panicking.

poor guy fell about 10 m into shallow water and never moved again. We were first on scene and I ended up taking over the 000 call from the victims friend as he was too panick stricken. 

We then spent the next 20 mins watching the body get washed around on the rocks so we could guide the “rescuers” in when the chopper finally arrived. 

My son was up on the road directing police and ambos down to where we were.

my son suffers from severe anxiety, at the moment it’s all still a bit of “excitement” but not sure how it will pan out when things calm down.

anyway just another reminder that life is precious, be careful out there. 

Holy cow. 

That's intense for the young fella. It goes without saying, but look after each other. Maybe a "man to man" ice cream? 

 

You're right. Life's precious. 

 

My best mate since Primary school sent me a pre op picture of himself.... Skin Cancers. I have to get back to him this arvo and ask how it went. He's really pale and freckly, as kids we'd run around getting sunburnt and not think about it. Scary stuff. 

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2 hours ago, roxii said:

Well that was an interesting afternoon. 

A break in the weather so took my son (11) out for a quick ride to the whale watching spot at Kurnell. 

just about  to leave when my son hears s yell and points towards the rocks. A man has fallen off and his friend is panicking.

poor guy fell about 10 m into shallow water and never moved again. We were first on scene and I ended up taking over the 000 call from the victims friend as he was too panick stricken. 

We then spent the next 20 mins watching the body get washed around on the rocks so we could guide the “rescuers” in when the chopper finally arrived. 

My son was up on the road directing police and ambos down to where we were.

my son suffers from severe anxiety, at the moment it’s all still a bit of “excitement” but not sure how it will pan out when things calm down.

anyway just another reminder that life is precious, be careful out there. 

Bloody hell. Good you were there to be able to be a calm presence when the bloke's friend was obviously unable to be under the circumstances. And great your son was able to be so responsible and helpful at such a tender age. 

Life is definitely precious and so very fragile. At work I see those who lose theirs through accident or incident and I also see those who piss it away with their lifestyle choices and other stupidity. Both circumstances make me mad in different ways. 

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Wow Roxii, hope your little bloke is ok. Definitely ice cream time!

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As others have said, not good Roxii. Not a great thing for an adult to see. From many years of ambulancing and being a community first responder I've seen my fair share of nasty stuff... the weird thing is what will "trigger" remembering it. I've stopped trying to work out the logic behind it and just accept that every now and then I'll get a flashback / emotional response to something that may have happened 3, 4 or even 10 years ago! 

Whenever I'm mentoring somebody who has just seen / experienced their first "crap job" that's the thing I tell them. There's no need to talk about it (unless they want to) but it's perfectly normal for it to freak you out at any point between now and forever.

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Hey Roxii, just checking to see that both YOU and your son are doing okay today?  Awful event for all involved.  ❤️

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Thanks Skel, all seems pretty good with the young fella today. 

Im ok, didn’t sleep great last night (I usually sleep like a log).

was taking to the wife about it and one if the scary things was that the two guys were pretty close together and if they had both fallen we possibly may not even have known they had fallen. That would have been tragic. 

I think the fact that we were busy while it was happening (trying to direct boats divers and choppers) and the fact that we didn’t actually see him fall and it wasn’t a “gruesome” death took the edge off it slightly. 

Thoughts really go out to the folks that deal with this stuff on a daily basis. The rescue chopper guy first of all risked his safety to retrieve a body, then  had to winch up with a deceased victim that must be tough to deal with. 

Thanks again all, feel like I just need a good run to clear the head, but cant do that.  :sadwalk:

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Kudos to all the people in the front line dealing with such tragedies every day. Huge respect to those people! 

Hope your kid (and you) can work through all what you saw!

In my rock climbing days I found a decomposing body in the bush below a cliff out near Nowra. Hard mental picture to shake!

Edited by Dalai
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On 04/06/2018 at 4:28 PM, Shrek said:

 

Life can be such a juggling act.....

Personal life went from good to shit, to very shit, and has now turned full circle and much better.....:-)

Although now work decides its going to screw me over...and getting the blame for things....meh...talk of restructuring me out...

Today i found out the outcome....

This beer tastes good....

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1 minute ago, Shrek said:

Today i found out the outcome....

This beer tastes good....

Bugger. I hope they gave you a decent exit package. 

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1 hour ago, roxii said:

Bugger. I hope they gave you a decent exit package. 

I had to be the support person for someone on Friday when they received their package. The money means stuff all.

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1 hour ago, Bored@work said:

I had to be the support person for someone on Friday when they received their package. The money means stuff all.

The redundancy money, is nice but it is hard to take when it happens to you. I got managed out in 2016 after 16 years.Upside was I was able to reinvent myself and move on.In hindsight it was a blessing. It gives me pleasure to see my old work become a debarkle since  I left.

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1 hour ago, BigRig said:

The redundancy money, is nice but it is hard to take when it happens to you. I got managed out in 2016 after 16 years.Upside was I was able to reinvent myself and move on.In hindsight it was a blessing. It gives me pleasure to see my old work become a debarkle since  I left.

Ditto. But 2015 after 10 yrs.

Landed on my feet with brilliant people

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3 hours ago, Bored@work said:

I had to be the support person for someone on Friday when they received their package. The money means stuff all.

I would love to get a redundancy package, bring it on I say

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10 minutes ago, -H- said:

I would love to get a redundancy package, bring it on I say

Yeah but nah. Wasnt a good interim period. Depends on the resources you have to whittle through

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I'm in a place where I'd be quite comfortable whittling through my resources while waiting for an opportunity to knock

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1 hour ago, -H- said:

I would love to get a redundancy package, bring it on I say

 

1 hour ago, Turts said:

Yeah but nah. Wasnt a good interim period. Depends on the resources you have to whittle through

It also depends on how much it's worth, and your employment prospects. I know a few in my area that are trying to get out with a package. They are looking at a couple hundred grand, and can walk into a job with less stress paying $80K pa. They are in their 60's and looking to wind down.

Me, I'd like 5 more years, then I'd jump at it, but if the opportunity came up, I'd be thinking seriously now. My wife is the handbrake there. Too cautious.

edit: I had to select, and then let go a few guys a number of years ago. They didn't want to go, but it had been decreed from a lot higher up that the numbers had to come down. It was one of the hardest jobs I've ever had, and boy did they hate me for a while. I'm still in contact with 2 of them, and they are all over it now, and probably doing better than they were. My comments above in no way meant I thought everyone that gets made redundant will be better off. I know it all depends on the circumstances at the time, and the opportunities that come along.

Edited by Ex-Hasbeen

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The guy I’m supporting has been on the edge & suffering mental health issues for the last 12months. 

Now he has got this kick in the guts.

For the record I think the company has done everything right & tried to help him as much as possible.

He hasn’t tried to turn things around at work & hasn’t been performing to level expected of his position. We lost the contract & only have work for 4 of the 5 people with his skill set on other projects.

It doesn’t make it any easier & I worry about him

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18 hours ago, Shrek said:

Today i found out the outcome....

This beer tastes good....

Sorry to hear mate.

FWIW, as someone who has been on the receiving end twice, both times after short tenure so the money was bugger all, and at very, very trying times (think post separation, post surgery/recovery, not in a good head space etc etc), I just wanted to let you know that this stuff works out.

Good people will find a way. I know it looks pretty bleak at the moment, but re-set yourself formulate a plan and execute!!

Good luck

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Good to hear, Shrek. Onwards and upwards!

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On ‎14‎/‎06‎/‎2018 at 8:36 PM, -H- said:

I'm in a place where I'd be quite comfortable whittling through my resources while waiting for an opportunity to knock

Pay out?. I have seen people just about end up in a psych ward who have sued for damages or been granted it..

Edited by Chuckie M

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To all those needing a boost I would like to share this.

You are no less important if you are falling short of the tip of the iceberg.  

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Thanks for that FB 

Really appreciate it, especially this week. 

Have to admit that I was struggling with my head space this morning. Only a few hours sleep worrying about stuff and work etc. Was going to do no training but I know that I am better regardless of how tired I am, AFTER training. 

 

 

Truly touched by this whole Busso thing but it is a lot to swallow when you have a shift in head space while injured. I switched off the "at all cost" switch. And I tell you now...... It's been REALLY TOUGH to turn back on. 

 

I'll do what I can. With a great program and the support I've received I'll be fine. 

 

Thanks again FB 😎✌️

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Hey Sam. I've a 'few' rehabs and am familiar with that switch!  I've found a good tactic when your head is in that space is to just focus on what you can do that do and build on it tomorrow. Forget 'eating the whole elephant' and just focus on the current slice you have on your plate.

Building on the day before keeps things incremental and consistent.  If you didn't do anything yesterday, do something today. Also remember, rest days and listening to your body when it needs rest is doing 'something'. 😎

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1 hour ago, FatPom said:

Hey Sam. I've a 'few' rehabs and am familiar with that switch!  I've found a good tactic when your head is in that space is to just focus on what you can do that do and build on it tomorrow. Forget 'eating the whole elephant' and just focus on the current slice you have on your plate.

Building on the day before keeps things incremental and consistent.  If you didn't do anything yesterday, do something today. Also remember, rest days and listening to your body when it needs rest is doing 'something'. 😎

Thanks FP 

 

Awesome 😎✌️

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Been in a flickin funny place of late.  My psych suggested it might be a good time for a review of meds with my doc, and we thought seeing a psychiatrist might be worth it.  My gp's practice has one come in (which would mean free for me) but the appoint kept getting postponed then cancelled and on and on.  And then when I went in to get my script of ad's filled, turns out they're on a national shortage list, and completely out of stock in the country.  So I've gone off them cold turkey in the last week!  Well, there's one way to tell if they're helping or not because I'm driving my wife fricking crazy atm, and been feeling a bit funny the last week.  Pretty headachy today.

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26 minutes ago, goughy said:

Been in a flickin funny place of late.  My psych suggested it might be a good time for a review of meds with my doc, and we thought seeing a psychiatrist might be worth it.  My gp's practice has one come in (which would mean free for me) but the appoint kept getting postponed then cancelled and on and on.  And then when I went in to get my script of ad's filled, turns out they're on a national shortage list, and completely out of stock in the country.  So I've gone off them cold turkey in the last week!  Well, there's one way to tell if they're helping or not because I'm driving my wife fricking crazy atm, and been feeling a bit funny the last week.  Pretty headachy today.

Bloody hell mate. 

Cold Turkey off meds is epic. I did that years ago and it was farked. 

 

Hopefully you can get an appointment soon. It's frustrating at times because of the lack of doctors who ARE SUITABLE. I saw one guy.... ONCE.... FOR 4min.... LOL I politely excused myself and said that he needed to try something different..... LOL it was funny at the time, but sad too. 

 

Take it easy dude 

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Yeah, it's been fun. I think I've been a bit manic this last week.  Unfortunately my doctor looked into it but there was no suitable replacement for them.  Happened to see my shrink after I came of and she was curious about the supply issue.  But, watch ya gonna do!  Face it, it's my wife who's got it the worst!  I can have about 5 different conversations going with her and switch between them without notice, or 10 minutes later suddenly jump back to one she thought was over with.  Driving her ****ing batty.  It's pretty funny!

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Ok, I'll post about this here because I'm a bit unsure exactly how to guide my daughter with this, and my wife and I differ on what we think she should do.

Firstly, Jas is very empathetic, and along with that seems to be very emotional herself.  She is most definitely bring bullied by some kids at school, and she works with one and they're bringing it into the workplace.  My wife wants her to go nuclear on her arse, reporting it at school and at work etc.

With the full situation around this, I want her to be a bit more gentle with it, ignoring them completely and accepting that what they say doesn't matter at all.  Two of the 4 kids were friends in her group at school, the most vocal one was one of her best friends.  The other two involved are their boyfriends.

The thing is, often when you see bullying, and certainly all that I and my wife both experienced, were from kids high up on the social chains at school, while we were down the bottom.  The difference here is that Jas is the one high up the chain, and the 4 doing this are the ones more so ostracised and I think they're laying the blame for this at Jas.  It's not the case, bit Jas did tell one of them that she couldn't be best friends with her anymore and since then, I guess others have abandoned her.  It seems she wasn't very well liked outside her social group, and even her social group was always fighting.

So I kinda want Jas to read more carefully, and strengthen herself and understand that while they're saying things online etc, people aren't believing then.  She knows they aren't being believed because she doesn't follow them anymore, but people will still let Jas know what they're saying.

At work there is is another kid who also doesn't like her, and he and this girl do talk about Jas a lot.  Others at her work are reporting to Jas what they say about her etc.

Apart from this, Jas is pretty much on a winner.  She's a school leader know and next year is pretty much front runner for school Captain (I know that's horn tooting, but it's true).  She's also advanced quickly past three other two at her work which clearly has exasperated things for her ex friend and has caused the issues with the other kid at her work.

I'm really not sure how to handle this one, but I feel like going nuclear isn't the right way.  I don't want Jas getting any bad rep for "sobbing them in", and affecting what she could have next year at school.  I feel like maybe just approaching this girl one last time and telling her she can continue going on with all her sniping and snide remarks and online posting, but they don't bother her anymore.  And that she should just go on living her life and I'll live mine and we don't exist to each other anymore?  And if you have a problem with me, then too bad for you.  But if you are going to continue with this behaviour then I will take things further.

I want her to show them that she's not bothered by then (she is) but that in the end she won't stand for it.

This all feels really odd considering Jas bright to the leadership group an idea for, and then ran a very successful couple of sessions with the year 7 and 8's on diffusing bullies.....

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I'm lucky I haven't had to go through this with mine yet, though I'm sure I will.  For what it's worth (which is less than the usual 2c) I think this needs to be considered as a chance to foster some resilience in Jas.  Having others whether they be parents, teachers or employers step in can also work against her in that if it doesn't work out she may think that it is out of her hands and feel helpless because of it.  Getting help shouldn't be seen as a sign of weakness but feeling that your happiness depends on something outside of your control can be debilitating.  Setting her up to be able to deal with these situations in her adult life, where fairness and help may be hard to come by, is important.

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That's kinda how I feel about it!  I might feel different if this was affecting her with other friends, or her reputation around school.  But if anything it's improved it.  She said lately other kids are talking to her and her group of friends.  If anything what they're doing is working against themselves.  I say chinup, realise that what they're doing isn't working out for them, and let them but themselves.

The work situation is a bit touchier, as has has been made a supervisor and given shifts where she is in charge of them but they sometimes refuse to do what she asks, or in the way she asks them to do it!

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Blergh...just blergh... doctor wants me to lose 5-10% of my body weight - its about 9-10kg and my grandfather died suddenly yesterday (the flu). I can't run (ITB/glute/hip issues), I can't bunch ride (only the TT) and the trainer is freaking squeaking. ****ing hell.

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18 hours ago, goughy said:

The work situation is a bit touchier, as has has been made a supervisor and given shifts where she is in charge of them but they sometimes refuse to do what she asks, or in the way she asks them to do it!

Agree with Stikman regarding fostering resilience, and the work situation, I feel like this should perhaps be treated no differently than if it were anyone else who was failing to perform while she is supervising them. 

 

3 minutes ago, MissJess said:

Blergh...just blergh... doctor wants me to lose 5-10% of my body weight - its about 9-10kg and my grandfather died suddenly yesterday (the flu). I can't run (ITB/glute/hip issues), I can't bunch ride (only the TT) and the trainer is freaking squeaking. ****ing hell.

Sorry to hear about your grandfather MissJess.

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2 hours ago, MissJess said:

Blergh...just blergh... doctor wants me to lose 5-10% of my body weight - its about 9-10kg and my grandfather died suddenly yesterday (the flu). I can't run (ITB/glute/hip issues), I can't bunch ride (only the TT) and the trainer is freaking squeaking. ****ing hell.

Take a deep breathe MJ.  Sorry to hear about your grandfather. 

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2 hours ago, MissJess said:

Blergh...just blergh... doctor wants me to lose 5-10% of my body weight - its about 9-10kg and my grandfather died suddenly yesterday (the flu). I can't run (ITB/glute/hip issues), I can't bunch ride (only the TT) and the trainer is freaking squeaking. ****ing hell.

Sending hugs xxx

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Please everyone look after yourself and those around you. 

Just heard some terrible news. 

Those who have been here an while will remember Yurtie and his wife Snoo. 

Unfortunately Snoo (Susan) passed away on Tuesday. Leaving behind Yurtie (Simon) and Rosella their daughter. 

Simon and I met through here and became good friends as did our families as our daughters are the same age. 

Susan suffered a lot and often with her demons. I don’t know the cause of death but I hope she is at peace now. 

😢

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Sorry to hear the news Roxii.

Whilst I have never met Yurtie, his contributions here were always well received.

Thoughts are with him, his family and friends.

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43 minutes ago, Ayto said:

Sorry to hear the news Roxii.

Whilst I have never met Yurtie, his contributions here were always well received.

Thoughts are with him, his family and friends.

Same from me x

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3 hours ago, roxii said:

Please everyone look after yourself and those around you. 

Just heard some terrible news. 

Those who have been here an while will remember Yurtie and his wife Snoo. 

Unfortunately Snoo (Susan) passed away on Tuesday. Leaving behind Yurtie (Simon) and Rosella their daughter. 

Simon and I met through here and became good friends as did our families as our daughters are the same age. 

Susan suffered a lot and often with her demons. I don’t know the cause of death but I hope she is at peace now. 

😢

That’s extremely sad news. I met Simon a few times and remember his writings about the family home with fondness. Please pass on my thoughts and wishes to his family if you speak to him Roxii.

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That is awfully sad news.  My thoughts are with Simon, Rosella and all their loved ones.  😥

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That's full on Roxii. 

Condolences to his family. 

 

 

 

Deep breaths Miss Jess. Hugs for you for your Grandfather. You can do the weight thing. Diet and lifestyle 👍

 

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OK 

 

This is beyond my control/joke etc 

 

I have now lost my girlfriend because of this Busso thing. 

 

Yes I have said that I want to to an Ironman one day. 

 

Yes I argued that I would like to go sub 10 

 

Yes I should "shut up and accept the gesture" 

 

Yes the generosity is out of this world. 

 

But I am not going well. 

I am really in a bad place. 

I'm DEEPLY upset about losing Ali. She's awesome. I tried my best to keep her. I'm trying my best to keep you all happy and repay the gesture. I'm trying my best to eat right ON NO MONEY. 

 

I can't do it. 

You win. 

I'm just another all talk loser. 

 

Close that thread Willie. 

 

Good night. 

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Sam,

Quote

I have now lost my girlfriend because of this Busso thing

This bit is concerning. Not because it's unreasonable to expect someone to dial back after year on year of IM but I find it strange that something that will be over in a few months is so big that that it got in the way of a nice, fledgling relationship.

I will fairly confidently say that if she genuinely ended it this quick, over something like IM, then if it wasn't IM it would have been something else down the track.

You know yourselves better than anyone but her reaction, in your situation = not normal.

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As we said from the start, you dont have to prove anything to us. I am more than happy for my $ to go to you to do with as you wish.

Do you think you saying that you are not doing Busso to her today would solve the problem? if so, go for it but I dont think that is the case...

However, 5 days ago, you said that your gf was accepting/supportive of your IM and you;d discussed it at length etc.. I cant fathom how it can go from that, to the opposite in such a short period of time so I agree with FP here..

Stay strong and talk here

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Hey mate,  sorry to hear that.  There is a lot going on there.

One thing that stick out to me is putting "I would like to go sub 10" in your first Ironman dream is a bit much. 

If you still want to do an Ironman, do what you can, go round, enjoy the day, get a finishers towel, get drunk and bask in the glow. 

When I did number 1 we had no idea what we were doing. We basically started 12 weeks out and just did bigger and bigger brick sessions each week. We at least knew we would be able to cover the distance. One of our last training sessions was a 210k ride 35 k run. 

On the back of these sessions I was stuffed till Wednesday each week so my training many weeks consisted of that one brick session and two swim sessions. That was it.  It may not have been right, it may not have been smart in hindsight, but we had no other idea (this is pre internet, pre coaches etc) so just do what you need to do to get through it, and the ability to do it quick or quicker can just be a product of how much spare time you have. 

FWIW there were 5 of us doing that, we all finished, all sub 13 and were all stoked. 

Relax, its supposed to be fun. 

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@FFF1077

#1 I reckon it would have been something else down the track too. Better to rip the band aid off now. Finding someone who is supportive is HARD!

#2 Mate, go round and enjoy the day, sub-17! The atmosphere at the last hour is great! (Probably as the spectators and 70.3ers are well drunk!) 

#3 Yeah, eating properly on no money is difficult. I've done it while being unemployed, my partner did it too.

Edited by MissJess
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Sorry to hear this FFF.

Hurts like heck now, but probably for the better if she doesn't have your interests at heart.

Are you doing it this year?

 

 

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Sorry to hear. My only advice is to talk/listen to those really close to you. Work out what's important no matter how hard. I know I'm speaking for all those from Trannies that supported you, we want the best of what's right for you - not us.

Life is what happens when you are busy making other plans.

FM

Edited by Flanman
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