Funny how things can change rapidly. I have been reading the site again for a little while. I was reading this very thread on Friday thinking, I have been in a good headspace for a long time. Then last night one of my work colleagues was killed in a motor vehicle collision on his way to work last night. It was about 500m from my house. I drove past it, spoke to the crew on scene, but at that stage we didn’t know. I only found out this morning.
We weren’t particularly close, but I have known him since he was a trainee, 9 maybe 10 years. He leaves behind a wife and 2 young kids.
I don’t want to go to work tomorrow, I don’t want to speak to welfare, I just want to tell them to **** off, because there is nothing they can say or do to change how I feel, or change what happened.
But I have to, I am upgraded, I have to make sure my troops are okay and the other members get the support they need. Because that is what is expected of me, that’s what I expect of myself.
It’s just such a waste, should never have happened, didn’t have to happen.
There is no god, if a priest tried to tell me, this is all part of god’s Plan, I think I would punch him. There is no plan, life and death are sometimes seconds or centimetres apart.