It's National Mental Awareness day so a timely time to post I guess.As others before have written,it is hard to right this sort of stuff about yourself,but I need to vent.Kudos to those who have.I have suffered from depression most my adult life, and don't take meds for it.Tried once and didn't like it.I have sought treatment on a few occasions.Since 2004 triathlon has been my medication, and brought a lot of inner joy and small personal victories despite being a back of the pack finisher.I have been in what I call my cyclonic mood for a long long time now .I am a slow moving rain bearing depression.The entire joy of training and competing has gone. I look at my bikes and go "Meh!" Even give myself a good upper cut from time to time but that has worn off.Nothing gives me any joy anymore.Last week my new boss flew in (80's style bullyboy manager, about my age, and no industry experience) and tore me a new one.It was bombing raid with zero notice.It's a new job which I was head hunted for 6 months ago, and I work on my own in sales role for the whole of WA.Sales dollar are 50% up on last year but am apparently not doing it the right way /his way.My KPI's, touch points, etc,blah blah....I have been in this Industry my whole life up to a senior role level,and never had any issues up till now.Working on my own is very new and probably hasn't helped as I am a social person.This was the icing on the cake for me and has pretty well finished me. I am considering quitting work/sport and taking a long time off to sort myself out, perhaps hire/buy a campervan and hit the road with the wife and travel around Australia. Maybe it time to smell the roses.Thanks for reading if you read this far to the end.